I Know Who I Am

But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. - 2 Cor 12:9

As I read this verse today, my first thought was "What a relief! God can use me despite my weaknesses." But the more I meditated on these words and other verses about weakness (Zech 4:6, 1 Cor 1:25, 27, Matt 5:3), the more I began to realize that the more significant message here is this: that God cannot use me if I will not admit my weaknesses. And I began to see the true difference between these points.

In order to do the work of God with any degree of success, we must have a sense of our own weakness. There is simply no room in His army for the arrogant or self-sufficient. We are fallen and in need of His mercy; serial sinners, incapable of anything good apart from Him. We are broken, and able to find healing only by His grace. We are too weak to win in battle on our strength alone. But when rely on Him--on His might--then we can be victorious.

Sure, there's nothing trendy about admitting one's weaknesses, nor one's brokenness. In fact, most of us spend a great deal of energy and effort trying to cover these up. But God calls us to be bold and humble: to acknowledge our needs, not to hide them. And to lay them at His feet. What He offers in return is freedom. What He offers is more of what we long for--more of Him.

"Mourning over your weakness? Take courage! Your emptiness is but the preparation for your being filled, and your casting down is but the making ready for your lifting up."--Spurgeon

my prayer tonight:

Father, I come to You tonight not only aware of my brokenness, but also thankful to You for it. For I have come to understand that my weaknesses only draw me nearer to You. As I struggle with the sins of the world, the conflicts between flesh and spirit, I am reminded again and again how reliant I am on You...to do good, and to win in battle. Remind me not to rest in my own faith, nor to depend on my own strength, but teach me to be humble and meek and reliant on You. For in You alone will I find victory. In You alone will I be made whole.

I Know Who I Am

I try so hard but I always fall short, so I've faced the truth of my weakness. There's nothing good that I can bring forth, but I stand in the strength of Your presence. I've wasted time always trying to face things alone. But I wait here now and I lay it all down...

I know who I am and I know I'm not able to stand on my own; I can't live all alone. So I'm taking my hands and I'm reaching them out. And I fall down. I fall down for you.

In times of brokenness always You show the depth of love that You bring me. When I'm kneeling down in Your presence I know: Your source of life I'm receiving. I place myself in Your arms that will always lead me. And I won't let go cause there's nowhere else to go.

I don't know why the things I want to do I always run from now. Because I know apart from You there's nothing that I can do where life will become new.

And I know who I am and I know I'm not able to stand on my own; I can't live all alone. So I'm taking my hands and I'm reaching them out, and I know that I'll take everything that's in me and fall down before You.

Jeremy Camp, Speaking Louder Than Before (click to play song)